Believe it or not this is not a #grumblebrag post (made that up but feel like it's a winner), but a post about how sometimes the work you can manage in those tiny pockets of naps and bedtimes can make you feel like a motherfuckin superhero.
I love my job. I think about it and plan for it and look forward to it the way someone who doesn't get to do it enough should. I worry about it too; about my lack of marketing and clients and generally getting out there. I basically beat myself up about not getting enough done whilst full time parenting, even though, I'm full time parenting so DUH. There is always a little niggling fear that I'm missing my time, my place in the world to do more of what I should be doing. I'm ready for that voice to pack up and do one.
The things is (and as a Brit and a woman saying this doesn't come naturally) I think I'm really good at what I do. I deeply love photographing families. Photographing connections. It brings be peace and joy and satisfaction. I think I'm offering something a little different, something a little special. But selling that? Selling myself is not my strong point. So whilst I know I'll get there, I mean, I have to get there because we need to eat, the journey can feel rough.
I've been thinking a little about motivation lately, about comparison and competition and inspiration. Last year I read this piece about those things in relation to women, about how women are not encouraged to be competitive with one another and what bullshit that is.
'Why shouldn’t women be competitive? If you had told me that some magazine was eliminating the Best Dressed ranking or the Most Beautiful top 100 list, I could get with that rationale. Because encouraging competition over clothes and/or physical appearance can be problematic. But the power list is supposed to be based on achievement and accomplishment. And why shouldn’t women compete with their heads, compete by achievement and accomplishment? In taking away this list, does it mean that women aren’t capable of being competitive when the competition is about THE WORK?!? That women can’t handle the pressure AT WORK?'I loved it at the time and was reminded of it yesterday with this follow up. I have a friend who is sooooo good at the business hustle. Extremely good at what she does. She works hard and imaginatively and it is so inspiring to me. I love when we get to talk business and geek out, and it made me realise how I need more of that. More conversation and support and motivation from women who are out there hustling. Because it's quite honestly magic to watch.
The last few weeks have been good work wise. Great even. I've found the two magic ingredients for a little work hustle - time and inspiration. Those two occurrences, simultaneously, are rare. Sometimes you need to write down and own the shit you have managed to do, so here is mine;
- I updated my website with images that I really love, regardless of what I think others might like
- I wrote about family photography and why I want to do it a little differently
- I shared some tips for taking your own photographs at home
- I started a google adwords campaign
- I'm actually updating my facebook business page
- hashtagging the shit out of instagram (which lead to my first insta-booking!)
There are always other things I need to do. A list that is added to with not much crossed off. I need to learn about SEO. I need to market myself. I need to get better at pushing through that uncomfortable-ness and sell myself. I'll get there.
In the meantime, the above is a pretty good start.
(and now for some random photos of my kids I took using tinfoil around the lens. obvi.)